Reflections on 2024
I spent much more time in observation and reflection in 2024 than in 2023. Articulating thoughts and feelings in writing helped me make better sense of life’s unfolding experiences. In my end-of-year post, I aim to capture recurring themes that emerged for me.
Power, Privilege and Purpose
As a brown man in a predominantly white world, I noticed how oblivious people are to their privilege and power, which sometimes creates blind spots even in the most well-intentioned people. Sometimes, it leads to behaviours that ignore or invalidate the lived realities of others.
- Acting as a saviour and creating solutions for people in the global majority, instead of with them
- Intellectualising, spiritually bypassing or tone policing in conversations with those facing intersectional impacts
- Encouraging and celebrating individual merit and agency in personal growth while overlooking the role of systemic forces, including intergenerational histories
It made me wonder how I benefited from my privilege as a Hindu, upper caste, cis-gendered male in India and how I had unknowingly or knowingly demonstrated one or more of these behaviours. In addition, I have been exploring power and privilege at home, as a husband or father, and within communities, as a steward, and noticing how these instinctive tendencies play out.
Turning the mirror to myself allowed me to meet these very people I had observed with empathy and an open heart. I was mindful to not be an activist, nor taking responsibility for their journey of healing and transformation. I have been able to receive them for who they are — appreciating what is good in them while acknowledging what needs work. (Grateful to my friend Emily for her kind witnessing and mirroring)
At the same time, it has helped me explore a potential contribution I could make as “a brown person in a white world” — bringing the voice and realities of the global majority into the discourse with gentleness.
Letting my light shine
I often hesitated to share on public platforms and in larger communities for three reasons. First, it felt unnatural in the digital world where everyone is posting, but very few are engaging in constructive dialogue. Second, making myself the centre of attention while desiring community-led, bottom-up change didn’t feel right. Third, I felt like an imposter because I knew others who could do a better job than me on every topic that interested me.
Over the years, many mentors have encouraged me to share my views more openly . They have urged me to be unafraid to bring my gift to the world, let my light shine, and remember that others have a lot to learn from me.
I worked on this input proactively in 2024. Some of my ongoing written reflections felt worth sharing with the world. I especially practised sharing in spaces where meaningful conversations were possible. I shared publicly only when it felt authentic and unforced.
By making reflections visible, I opened up opportunities to connect with others and expand my views. I was able to reframe building visibility as an opportunity to learn and unlearn.
Being like water
One of my concerns moving abroad was how I would carve a path for bringing my deepest intention of weaving communities and experiences for belonging and healing into the world, while having financial security and assurance of a residence permit. My work in India was fluid and spread across a range of like-spirited collaborators, but I could not afford that luxury here being an expat.
I trusted my intuition and prioritised working:
- with kind, supportive and driven people
- in settings where my skills and orientations could be put to use
- in organisational cultures where my values were seen as a strength
Deprioritising roles, job titles and salaries meant stepping into work where I was overqualified. It felt uncomfortable at first. There were moments I felt unchallenged, frustrated or bored at times, but I was able to navigate those phases by acknowledging the discomfort, reminding myself of my deeper why. I appreciated the gifts that came with this phase. These included time to get to know my new teams and their contexts well and more mind space for my inner work and family.
Today, I am working on two nourishing projects — one that is focused on weaving a self-organised global community of regenerative leaders, leveraging my skills in facilitating dialogue and community weaving, and the other, focused on using technology to enable meaningful, contextual conversations at scale, leveraging my skills in design, learning and development, and program management. Together, they serve my personal intention well, allow me to play at the edge and work with talented, inspiring people I can learn from.
I was flowing like water on paths of least resistance, while chipping away and carving my own course with gentleness. For the first time, I felt I wasn’t striving, and simultaneously being deliberate about creating more space for who I want to be in this world. Bruce Lee captures this sentiment much better than I do:
“Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves.
Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”
Bruce Lee
Resting Unapologetically
A dear friend asked me, “What has been the highlight of your year?” And I said, “I have shifted my relationship with rest.”
My breaks were always about taking time off work, but they were still “full” of activities — traveling, learning, reading, socialising, catching up with movies, running through personal to-do lists, etc. I often ended these breaks feeling more tired than when I began — needing a holiday to recover from the holiday.
After my burnout in 2013, I built practices for pausing and re-energising different parts of myself, which have been helpful. However, I always struggled with being still and letting go of the need to do something, especially over prolonged windows of time.
In 2024, there were more days when I set an intention to rest and successfully did nothing throughout the day. As I journaled at night, I was surprised to find that I did not feel guilty or stressed about the impending chores. Instead, I experienced a sense of inner spaciousness and a profound connection with the earth and the people around me.
I have also said no to many constructive experiences to honour this sacred space for rest. For instance, I joined an insightful course on deep transformation. After the first couple of weeks, my body didn’t feel it could engage attentively with the live sessions scheduled in the late evening. I decided to honour what my body was telling me and opted-out, despite knowing the course would be beneficial. This was unimaginable for the old, diligent me.
Experiencing rest has made me feel nourished and more open to whatever unfolds in life. I have been more grounded, resilient, and compassionate.
When I am rested, I’ve noticed that I approach work with greater clarity and focus and am more creative. I have also become a better parent and husband, having more space for joy and playfulness, as well as sharing, listening and reflecting together with presence.
Closing Out
I ended my reflection last year with this intention: "In 2024, I intend to reflect on what I am learning more consistently and deepen my spiritual practices. I want to value my inner growth and embodiment of learning as much as acquiring new skills and knowledge." I am grateful for all the cosmic forces — human and otherwise — that came together to bring this intention to life.
In 2025, I intend to play more to my strengths at work, embody mental, sensory and creative rest more intentionally, and nurture a local community of support for my family and me.
I wish you a 2025 where you can be like water, and find a more nurturing inner and social soil. I am excited about what the year would bring for both of us.
